I had never been very good at socializing but then not too bad either.
With my school friends, with certain people, it was like magic. With others it was a question lurking in the background: “but why not with these people?” something I thought about but not too much, I ignored it, took it like a fact of life a question such as “is there a God?” – something that is understood maybe not crystal clear but something that everybody knows somehow, but nobody can clearly explain it.
I am a very warm person but the same recipe didn’t work with everybody.
I was going to meet the crowd but this time I was ready not to feel bad. But what would be different this time? I could hear myself say: "...but what 'could' it be, must be something I have'nt figured out yet."
It was the same crowd a couple of years past, now I don’t feel that bad, I am not questioning myself...there is a 'distance'.
I appreciate this distance now just like I appreciate silence in a conversation. It is something I have taken a while to learn: “It is important to be warm as much as it is important to keep your distance but what is most important is to learn how to choose between the two.”
With my school friends, with certain people, it was like magic. With others it was a question lurking in the background: “but why not with these people?” something I thought about but not too much, I ignored it, took it like a fact of life a question such as “is there a God?” – something that is understood maybe not crystal clear but something that everybody knows somehow, but nobody can clearly explain it.
I am a very warm person but the same recipe didn’t work with everybody.
I was going to meet the crowd but this time I was ready not to feel bad. But what would be different this time? I could hear myself say: "...but what 'could' it be, must be something I have'nt figured out yet."
It was the same crowd a couple of years past, now I don’t feel that bad, I am not questioning myself...there is a 'distance'.
I appreciate this distance now just like I appreciate silence in a conversation. It is something I have taken a while to learn: “It is important to be warm as much as it is important to keep your distance but what is most important is to learn how to choose between the two.”
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